If you've read my previous blog post about how excited I am for something and how I'm preparing myself for a challenge, then, that was a thing of the past. I got caught off guard with what I expected to happen. Unfortunately, that blessing wasn't given to me. I don't want to give further details about it, so let's just put it this way: Everything happens for a reason and no matter how much you give effort and passion to something you want, if it's not for you, then accept it.
I never really thought about it as something negative because I thought I was the kind of person who get what she wants. With my background as a student before, I got to be one of those lucky chosen ones. The one who belongs to a group of leaders that help others. I don't have Einstein's brain but I do have passion. I was waiting for that opportunity for almost a year now and then, it slipped away in just a snap of a finger. At first I had little regrets on one decision I made because I was so sure of myself. I didn't feel embarrassed though because people understood how I felt and we all know, that's life.
At some point, I kept on thinking...Maybe I wasn't meant to be a...Maybe I'm destined to be in another profession...Maybe God doesn't want me to go through any tough time because he's leading me straight to a very big opportunity, bigger than I imagined..or Maybe I'm no good. Maybe I'm just unlucky. Uggghhh. Self pity. One's battle with the ego.
POLITICS. In every establishment, there's always politics. Maybe 20% I'd have to blame this to Politics because it is just so unfair. You go through a series of interviews and tests, you do your best and then, people with connections get away with the position you've been wanting to have. (SHOUTING INSIDE).
The 80% I'd blame myself, because that was my fate.
So in the words of the wise, MOVE ON. Rejections and failures are part of life. You hate them, you want to strangle them, stab them. (If only Rejection and Failure are objects). But that's just part of the ride. I know it's so easy to say move on but it's harder to channel. I'll take this one baby step at a time.
P.S. Now I'm concentrating with my 18 month old toddler. This is the crucial part of child rearing because this is the time wherein their brain develops fast. Proper teaching and feeding is very much important. Who knows, I'm raising the future President of the Philippines. haha