Mother's day is just a few days away and I just had the feeling to share to you how my story all started.
I never really expected to become a Mom at a very young age. I had my future plans all lined up, hospital duty for 2 years, go abroad,the list goes on...At first I had the guilt and disappointment first with myself because why did I get myself in this situation. Next, the disappointment and anger I would give to my parents. I know they never expected me to get pregnant because they know themselves that they taught me well with values and morals. And they do. I still carry with me until now every lesson towards life, friendship,work and relationships with people. This specially goes to my mother who has been so supportive of me(Happy Mom's day!!:) I know I have hurt her a lot with crashing expectations. And to my father who also worked hard to give us a very bright future. After the breaking..errr..life changing event, my boyfriend (now my husband) had also mixed emotions of the upcoming little bundle we were about to have. He has also future plans of his own and that he is aware that it will be put to halt the moment I give birth. I am just so thankful that we both faced it hand in hand, and never turned away. I am also blessed with a lot of supportive friends who never left me in my darkest hours and craving moments. As every month passed, my faith and courage grew stronger and my belief that we will be good parents slowly sank in. Slowly because I know I will be leaving my usual routine as a single person. I know there will be less /no more spontaneous hang outs, no more shopping, less time with friends, times ten hard work. On the brighter side, I had also put into mind that there's no stopping with out future plans. It's only a minute pause and for all we know, we're back on track. I also think I am heading to a path that's straight to success. We started early, we started to build a family and so I don't need to go back down the road and find someone to marry when I reach my 30s.haha kidding to everyone who is single or who hasn't tied the knot. I believe its or own "diskarte" or outlook that makes us achieve our dreams. There is no easy way to success, the more you work hard for it, the more feeling of accomplishment you'll get. Time is our only enemy now. For me and my husband, its time that knows when will our journey be back on track.
I do hope after reading this part, I don't get judged as someone who "got pregnant no future" stigma. I am very happy of where we are right now. With no masks. Certain changes though are being taken in one by one,like no financial support from my parents like I used to have. No more shopping(haha. once in a while, I buy stuff for myself through my business, and c/o hubby). Less time with friends. I am not saddened with this though, except for the fact I am still
unemployed. I'm actually kinda bored of having to stay at home most of the time. I need some action people! I have pending applications in the hospitals so I am praying to get hired as soon as possible so that I'll have a salary of my own. Other than this, I enjoy every waking moment with my husband and daughter.
Going back 2 years ago which was 2010, we found out I was pregnant last July 6,2010 a Monday. I have regular periods ever since I got it so when June 2010 came, I was worried why I didn't have any menstruation yet. It comes mostly at the end of the month, so I waited a week more to see if I'll get any. I was having duty that day when my dutymates (Hi Nikki! Plenny, Lycel, Jenny, and Xavier!haha) all helped me to do a pregnancy test. During lunch time, we went to a nearby mall and bought the test. Yes,we all went.haha. Curious and anxious, the girls accompanied me in the comfort room. All 5 of us were crowded in the cubicle waiting for either 1 line or 2 lines. (Slowly filling in.....1 bar......2 bars) And there was silence.haha..I broke down in tears while they were tearing up as well. My body got weak and shaky not knowing what to do. It was fear that made me feel that way. I immediately called my boyfriend and told him the news. He was silenced as well. After duty, I called my boyfriend and closest barkadas to gather in one of my friends house to do a second test. It was positive.Haaaaayyyy!!! I remember the feeling like it was just yesterday. You know what happens next. Dramas and crying sessions with my Mom and Father.
We consulted an OB a week after we knew and found out through transvaginal ultrasound I was 6 weeks pregnant.:)
Georgina Samuelle is now 14 months old and is the most beautiful and active kid! She likes to dance and watch cartoons, play with her cousins, eat a lot and loves to shop with me and my Mom. Everything was all worth it because having a daughter is one of the most precious achievement a woman can have. I'll talk about my pregnancy experiences and in the labor&delivery room in another post. Teaser, I think I'm one lucky pregnant woman to have withstand painful contractions without oxytocin!haha!
I've been talking about flashbacks so here are some of my pregnancy photos!:)
|This picture was taken at a friend's wedding on June. I never knew about it yet. I've noticed I had glowing skin that time.(Baby turned out to be a girl. Thank you hormones!)|
|Picture after knowing I was pregnant. This is me with a 2 month tummy.|